Currently Tiger Woods has enlisted his childhood friend Bryon Bell to be his caddie this week at the WGC – Bridgestone and at next week’s PGA Championship. When asked if Bell would be a permanent fixture Tiger replied “Have you seen his legs?” So the question then becomes, what kind of legs is Tiger looking for? One would have to assume he wants fit legs, a pair that would be able to handle 4 rigorous days of carrying and walking. Tiger has indicated that he wants someone that emulates both Mike "Fluff" Cowen and Stevie Williams in the caddie department. Well I say that is a tall order because Fluff has short stumpy legs and Stevie has taller fit legs. My legs do however land in that spectrum, further substantiating my claim that I would be Tiger’s best choice. Throughout the years Tiger’s caddies have been excellent at maintaining crowd noise. I believe that my previous teaching experience and classroom management skills would enable me to excel in this department. Finally, by employing me, I can help to rebuild Tiger’s image since I am a female – need I say more. Should for some crazy unknown reason Tiger decide not to hire me, a huge mistake of course, I will continue to cheer for him, mostly in part to shut up the broken record that is the media.
I agree Mary that you are Tiger's last hope. The poor guy has had a rough time recently ... and he needs all the help he can get ... legs or no legs.
ReplyDeleteTiger, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?
- William Blake